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Saturday, December 31, 2016

Finding Audrey

Hello Guys!


We're the 31st today, the last day of 2016! & I really want to write one more blog post this year. I've read another book as I've received the wonderful opportunity of getting paid while waiting for attention. Attention to the company, not to me. 

The book I've just finished is one I bought at the airport on my way back from Erasmus. 


It's 
Finding Audrey 
by Sophie Kinsella. 


To be honest I wanted to buy the 2nd part of Girl Online by Zoella, but it was sold out. & what's the point of buying the 3rd part, without knowing what happened before?

Finding Audrey popped up somewhere on my social media, but I didn't plan to buy it. However as I needed to do something during the flight (my first flight alone!!!) and you can't have too many books I chose this one. I've heard of Sophie's books and I think I read one before. YES, it was I've Got Your Number! Loved that one! I also read one of the Shopaholic series, but didn't finish. 

I have to admit, even though I'm not a teenager anymore, I like chick-lit. The stories don't make me daydream as much as a few years ago and I'm also more critical, but they're so easy to read and of course they have inspirational quotes. Something I live for.

The beginning of Finding Audrey caught my attention and I wanted to know what was going on. It took a surprising turn. I thought it would be about a fun adventure and a handsome stranger who turned into a lover. Well, the second part was present, but the first part wasn't so much fun.


"To put you out of your misery here's the full diagnosis. Social Anxiety Disorder, General Anxiety Disorder and Depressive Episodes."


Every year I have the impression these disorders are given more and more attention, which I consider as a good thing, because people who don't have this disorder honestly don't understand it. Personally I don't think I have a disorder, I consider it more as a wave that comes and goes, depending on outside factors. If I had to decide everything myself, I would be perfectly fine, but when life surprises me and I'm not prepared for it... It's different.

***

"So I can tell myself rationally that talking to Linus in the same room and everything will be fine. No worries. What's the problem? A conversation. What could be dangerous about a conversation? But my stupid lizard brain is all like 'Red alert! Danger! Run away! Panic! Panic!' and it's pretty loud and convincing. And my body tends to listen to it, not to me. So that's the bummer."

"That's a common mistake people make, actually. Stressful events don't make you ill, actually. It's the way your brain reacts to stressful events."


"I have a teeny problem. It's not the outside per se. It's not trees or air or sky. It's the people. I mean, not all people. Probably not you; you'd be fine. I have my comfort people - people I can talk to and laugh with and feel relaxed with. (...) I can eat supper with my family. (...) Because they are not a threat. (...) It's everyone else who is the problem. People on the street, people at the front door, people on the phone. (...) Dr Sarah says (...) I have to dial down the thoughts that are telling me to panic. When she's telling me this (...) I think, Yes! I can do that! Easy. But then a postman comes to the door and I run before I can even stop myself."

***



***

What I like about this kind of books is that they give you advice, without necessarily overwhelming you with theories. The new ideas, which are still unknown to you are intertwined into the story and it's up to us to find them. Another thing I love about fictional characters is realising how similar to me they are sometimes. An identical version doesn't exist, but I pick up the puzzle pieces that I've lost and find myself again in books.


***

'I was the paranoid that everyone must be looking at me, thinking how uncool I was. At the same time, I was the one who got shown off to all the visitors: "Our straight-A student, Audrey"'


"We don't have to reveal everything to each other. That's another thing I've learned in therapy: it's OK to be private. It's OK to say no. It's OK to say, 'I'm not going to share that.'"

"Linus might come over. He might not. Either way is fine. Either way, his decision is about himself, not about you. You are not responsible for his feelings."


They talk about 'body language', as if we all speak it the same. But everyone has their own dialect. For me right now for example, swiveling my body right away and staring rigidly at the corner means 'I like you.' Because I didn't run away and shut myself in the bathroom. I just hope he realizes that.

***

And sometimes you recognise others in books, like your mum for example, haha! I wasn't into video games myself, but being friends with your cousin and having a best friend who was a boy, I had to accept it to be part of the gang.


***


"'But why does everyone have to be so greedy and violent? In the end Frank snapped, 'It's Land of Conquerors, Mom, not Land of Community Sevice Volunteers'"


"If I'm the Queen of Overreaction, Mum is the Empress."

***

How to summarise my opinion? Finding Audrey is an easy book to read. As there is not lots of text on one page, you can easy read it within two days. As I said before, I enjoy deepness in books, here it was discussing several anxiety disorders. What I didn't really enjoy about the story, was that it discussed video games and computers way too much. What I loved about the book? When the videos she made about her family turned at the whole end into some sort of vlog. This kind of video-blogging looks like a hobby in real life, but I believe to some it is some sort of therapy. 

That's it for today. 




Have a wonderful New Year's Eve! I hope I won't be ill, because I don't feel too great now. 
Enjoy your night and I'll talk to you next year! 


MissCherry xo

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